Bloody Hrekin!
by DarkAngel777
Summary: WHat the HELL? Kids? In Achmed's palace! Yeah right!
1. Default Chapter

A/N: This is my 2nd fanfic. So be nice! DA777

Chapter 1: _OH MY GOD_!

"I said NO!"

"You think you can boss me around?!"

"Ye- NO!"

"Then let me go!"

"To the Caldron? To him?"

"'He just happened to know me for 1,400 centuries!"

"It- AUGH! Fine! As long as I can come with you!" Ashe finally growled.

"Thank you! I want to see Elysian again." Rhapsody sighed.

"I just got the letter Yer' Majesty, she's coming." Grunther grinned happily.

"Finally! We still need to discus political matters with," A low growl came from Achmed's throat, "Tristan Steward."

"Bad news, 'Ochmed. The Duchess is bringin' 'er 'usband."

"Wonderful! Now we can watch them pretend nothing's going on between them and pretend everything's ok !" Achmed growled, voice dripping with sarcasm.

Rhapsody and Ashe arrive

All of them sat at the table quietly in a silent tension web.

"So, what is it that Tristan wants this time?" Rhapsody asked.

"Well, he seems, from my sources, wants to start Spring cleaning again."

"WHAT!" Grunther roared, leaping from his chair. "I'll find 'is bloated 'ead and squash it into a pile of"

"Enough, Grunther." Rhapsody said calmly. "I'll simply go to his office and-"

"Seduce him." Achmed finished, eyeing Ashe.

"_What_?!" Ashe exclaimed.

"Ha ha, very funny Achmed. I'll just give my points of view and he will understand, as always, and get him to resign the agreement." Achmed opened his mouth to say something when the door slammed open with a CRACK!

"Father!" a kid screamed and ran through the doors and in front of the table. "I-"they paused. "You didn't tell me Auntie Rhapsody was coming." The kid turned out to be a girl in mid-teens. Her hair was black and ran down to her middle back. But it's the eyes that struck everyone. They were a sharp piercing blue that seemed to be an endless pit of dark sapphires.

"Who the hell are you?" Grunther finally asked.

"It's me Grunther. You know, Raven." She received blank stares.

"Why's he here?" she demanded pointing at Ashe. "I thought you hated him, Father." All stares pointed to Achmed.

"Whose daughter are you?" Rhapsody asked calmly.

"What the _hell_ is wrong with you people? _Achmed_! _King Achmed_! Duh!" There was a dull silence.

"_Oh my God!"_ Ashe exclaimed.

"Bloody_ hrekin!_" Grunther and Achmed yelled.

"What?" Raven asked, looking around. "What is it? Do I have something on my face?"

Ok, I know that that was short… and sucked. But I promise to try and make it better! Give me ideas! Please!

DarkAngel777


	2. What To Do With Raven

OK, I still need help and I know this will suck too. I'll get help! O no. I sound like a drug addict.

Chapter 2: What to Do

At Dinner

Raven sat next to Achmed playing with her food.

"So, you're my daughter."

"Yup." She said sadly.

"Am I such a wonderful father?" he said with sarcasm.

"You were… until now."

"If you're Achmed's daughter, why don't we know you?" Rhapsody asked kindly.

"I don't know. You tell me."

"'Ow come yer dressed in black?" Grunther asked, trying to be nice.

"Because Father said training will be easier with black on." Raven said, as though it were obvious.

"How?" Ashe asked. Raven glared at him. "I don't like you. Don't talk to me."

"Rhapsody, your friends are so nice and friendly." Ashe muttered.

"We're not deaf you know. Keep your thoughts in your head unless you're honest enough to say them out loud." Raven snapped.

"She's got a point." Rhapsody sighed. "As for you, Rhapsody, I've lived here my whole life. I thought you knew me. Maybe I got ripped out of my time place and got put here. Like how you met that idiot." She said nodding at Ashe.

"Well, you inherited Achmed's attitude an' hatred." Grunther chuckled. Rhapsody and Achmed couldn't help but laugh or smirk at this.

"Is my room still the same?" Raven asked, pushing her unfinished food away.

"Where was yer old room?"

"Rhapsody said I should have Jo's old room when you guy's found out that I was as messy as her." Raven bowed her head respectively. "May I go to my room now?" Achmed nodded his head in approval. "Good-night everyone." She walked out of the dining hall. After she was gone, all the questions started pouring in.

"Who've you slept with lately?"

"I didn't know you could get a girl without paying!"

"Good job sir!"

"I thought you hated children-"

"Do you know who the mother is?"

"What are you goin' to do with 'er sir?"

"QUIET!" Achmed shouted, standing up and letting his chair fall behind him. "For now, I'll take care of her until we find a way to send her back to where she came from. Gods, he wasn't ready for this. " Is it alright with you…? Raven?" Achmed asked turning around and looking at the ceiling. A human form jumped off the ceiling and gracefully landed on their feet. "Yes, Father." Raven whispered. She walked out of the room and out into the hall.

"Well, that was intrestin'." Grunther said. A moment later, Raven's head popped in. "Uh, what happened to my room? I can't find it." She sounded so confused, that Rhapsody felt so sorry for her. "I'll take you there." She offered while standing up.

"Thanks." Raven said, opening the door wider. Rhapsody tried to walk towards her when Ashe pulled her a little bit down. "Don't trust her," he whispered. Rhapsody scowled and yanked her elbow free. As both of them walked through the door. "Wait!" Raven said quickly. She ran back into the room. "I'm not deaf you know," she snapped at Ashe.

In Raven's Room

"So," Rhapsody asked, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Do you want to talk or something?"

"Uh, sure." Raven said, sitting on the opposite side, "About what? Do you have any questions?"

"Actually, yes. Yes I do. How did you get here?"

"I'm not sure. I woke up in the hall, so I walked into the banquet hall. And, so here I am." She said breezily. Rhapsody seemed satisfied. "Who's your mother?"

"I-I don't know." She said nervously. "I-I'm tired okay. Do you mind if I …?"

"Oh, yes! Of course!" Rhapsody said quickly, being reminded of Jo. Rhapsody closed the door behind her and walked back to the banquet hall. She could hear murmuring in the room ahead. She walked in and retook her seat. Achmed sat with his fingertips to his lips as everyone was in deep thought.

"Did you find anything out?" Achmed asked after a moment of silence. "The mother? Where she came from? Anything?"

"She doesn't know where she came from." Rhapsody said sadly. "And she doesn't even know who her mother is."

"That doesn't help." Ashe said.

"She may be lying." Achmed suggested. Rhapsody's eyes widened in surprise. "How can you say that!?"

"Well, first I learned to talk, and then I-"

"You know what I mean!" Rhapsody said angrily.

"I need more information dammit!" Achmed said.

"I don' know, sir," Grunther said, "She acts a lot like ya. And have some of the same looks. Dark hair, a little tall."

"Maybe she _was_ plucked out of time." Ashe put in. "I was."

"I suppose." Achmed said reluctantly.

Raven's Room

Raven sat on her bed, feeling the vibrations of tense voices in the air. She sighed. _I think it was Father's deal with the Gate Keeper he made. Or maybe that hasn't happened. Or maybe… I'm not real._ Raven shook her head. _Father was right. I think too much._ She went to the corner of the bed and rocked back and forth, twirling her hair in her fingers._ Maybe Meridian did this for me. Like, a warning? Hmm. Or! Maybe I'm supposed to see something that I should know! Curse this!_ Raven curled into a ball on her pillows. _Maybe I can see who my mother is…or was._

I know that this sucks, but if you keep reading- ok screw this. It doesn't matter if you read it; just tell me what you want! PLEASE!!!! Thanks 4 reading (if you did)!


	3. Achmed and Raven

I probably sound mean, but please! Give me ideas! I'm begging you!

Chapter 3: Achmed and Raven

Raven rose, as always, before dawn after a few hours of sleep. Quickly, she hopped out of bed and walked to the dining hall. At the door, she could hear rustling inside. Cautiously she slinked inside and pulled out a dagger from of her wrist sheath. Then she saw a golden-haired head leaning on the table. Raven relaxed and re-sheathed her dagger.

"Good morning Rhapsody." Raven greeted while she sat on her chair across from her.

"Good morning!" Rhapsody said cheerfully, "So I'm not the only one gets up this early."

"Shouldn't Grunther and Father be up?" Rhapsody looked confused. "Why?"

"Well, Grunther with the troops and Father usually gets up to explore Gwyliam's library." Raven stated while grabbing some fruit. Rhapsody nodded. It did sound like them.

"You still have questions, don't you." Raven said as a statement, not a question.

"Yes. If it's too hard for you…"

"No, it's fine."

"How old are you?"

"14."

"Do you feel heartbeats, like Achmed?"

"Well, sometimes. Not very much."

"Are you educated?"

"In what? School? Yes, very well actually. You, Father, and Grunther taught me lots of things. Even Ashe helped."

"Do you have any friends?"

"Besides my family? I'd occasionally visit Gwidyon and Melanie. This feels like I'm being questioned from a judge. Can you make the questions more opened ended?"

"Enough questions. The sun is rising and I would like to sing my morning bade." Rhapsody stood up and walked towards the door and stopped. "Would you like to accompany me?"

"Yes please." Both of them quickly ran outside and found a good view of the sun in a clearing where Rhapsody started to sing as she drew Daystar Clairton. (Am I spelling these things right? I don't have a copy of any of the books!) Raven gracefully sat on the ground, listening to the calming rhythms of Rhapsody's clear sweet voice.

Achmed

Achmed sat in the tree watching the two of them. It looked so… natural. But it didn't seem right. Like something was missing. Maybe he was just being paranoid. No. Being paranoid is good. It just means that you're more careful and see things others don't. Something was wrong. Rhapsody turned and said something to Raven, which made Raven blush and shake her head furiously and shook her hands quickly in front of her in "x" forms. Rhapsody apparently insisted because Raven started to scramble away playfully and Rhapsody playfully grabbed her hand and tried to pull her up. After a couple minutes Rhapsody apparently had gotten what she wanted. She helped pull Raven up and said some things to her. She nodded. Then together they started to sing.

Raven and Rhapsody

Raven felt embarrassed as she stumbled a little over some of the melody as Rhapsody sang harmony. Raven never thought she had a good singing voice, but now it sounded like screeching to her ears. She heard a small rustle behind them in the trees, and then a small crack of a twig. Raven carefully unsheathed her dagger, trying not to be noticed by Rhapsody who seemed oblivious to it all.

Achmed

Achmed quickly struggled to regain his balance. How could he have been distracted by that music? Oh no! Where's the branch? _Quickly, quickly! Oh bloody hrekin._

"What the hell!?" Raven shouted as a figure tumbled out of a tree. Rhapsody quickly pointed the flaming sword at the undignified heap on the ground. "Who are you?" she demanded, "What do you- Achmed?"

Achmed struggled to his feet and brushed himself off. Rhapsody and Raven muffled their giggles with their hands. "Why in the _world_ were you in a tree?" Rhapsody asked, hiding a smile behind her hand.

"I was simply- simply-retrieving a stray arrow of yours." Achmed said as honorably as he could.

"Really," Raven said turning to the now fully risen sun. "I'm hungry. Do you care to have some sport and hunt for food?" Raven challenged with a wicked smile. Achmed and Rhapsody stood confused. This girl really stated random things.

"Why do you ask?" Achmed asked. This kid was weird. "I don't know. I'm bored I guess. You used to send me to hunt food in case we traveled and I got lost. Such the cautious father you are- were." Raven's eyes suddenly dark sapphire eyes suddenly grew brighter than the sun. "Why don't we have a competition?" she exclaimed excitedly, "We can have Grunther and Ashe join us! We can have some bets! Or make the losers do something awful!" she cackled evilly as Achmed and Rhapsody stared at the cackling girl. Well, it was getting quite boring in this place, with peace here and all.

"Achmed, it does sound fun." Rhapsody said calmly, but they could see the excitement in those emerald eyes. "It has been quite dull. And I like the part about the losers."

Achmed stared at the two with a blank expression on his face. "Do what you like but I will not participate." Rhapsody and Achmed watched as Raven's face fell. "Why?" she demanded. "Because I do not wager and do not play games. I have much work to do."

"Like what? Signing papers? Oh, what grueling work." Her voice dripping with sarcasm. Achmed tuned on his heel and stalked off.

"Are you afraid that Ashe will beat you?" Rhapsody called after him. This made Achmed stop. Rhapsody caught Raven's eye and winked. Raven's confused look formed into a wicked face. "Your husband _does_ look very fit. Maybe he_ could_ beat Achmed at competition. Ashe probably does this all the time."

"Oh yes, he has _lots of muscles._ He is very fast and strong. And handsome as well! And rich and is actually kind! That is very rare to find!" Rhapsody giggled. Achmed walked up to the chuckling women.

"What do the losers do?" Achmed asked.

"That's up to the winners." Raven grinned.

"I am only doing this because I need to get to know you better." He said to Raven.

"I'm sure you are." Rhapsody laughed.

Ok! I know this one was slow and still sucks but I've always wanted to see- read that Achmed falls out of a tree! I have no idea why but I love it!

DA777


	4. Authors Note

Thank you for the reviews! Especially to Vcorrigan! I like people like you, but hate you at the same time! You tell the truth and still offend. I am so proud of people like you!May I please say that I don't own a copy of any, _any_, of the books.sniff WWWAAHHH! I WANT A COPY! Thanks again for the reviews! And if someone could send me the correct spellings of stuff, I'd appreciate it!

DA777


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